The Tequila.

Year one, of round one at a little thing called university.


I was living in residence at the time, a bunch of us on the floor went to go watch the basketball game and after the game we got back and was going into my room when I saw a note posted on the door. The note read as follows...

"Derek, I got the limes! - D" (also had a picture of a lime drawn on it.

So about a month ago while I was perusing a LCBO (Liquor Control Board of Ontario), it is where we buy our alcohol, I decided it was a good idea to buy a bottle of tequila. Actually I thought it would be a very good idea. At the time a girl on the floor, Danielle, and I had developed a bit of a bond with each other and I told her that I got a bottle of tequila you pick up some limes or lemons and we will have ourselves a tequila night. That night after I got back from the basketball game, that is exactly what we had. We immediately jumped right in and had a couple of shots each within the first couple of minutes and then decide we might want to slow down a bit. In reality though, we really did not slow down too much. It was a twenty-six ounce bottle, and each shot was one ounce. Meaning that there was a total of twenty-six shots consumed, and all those shots were consumed within a matter of a couple hours. The breakdown was like this...

Danielle - 9
John - 3
Lauren - 2
Myself - 12
Total - 26

The next day was Lauren's birthday and she was going out that night to start her celebration so of course, she deserved a couple of shots. Danielle was a bit of a pansy and had to stop after number nine and passed on the rest to John who happily took over for her. And of course myself who managed to get through all twelve of mine without a problem. Well not completely.

See the thing was that Danielle and I were late night buddies, we both had insomnia and were basically up to the wee hours of the morning in the television lounge mostly just chilling. Everybody else on the floor got the idea that was something was going on between the two of us even though there was not. I actually had a girlfriend at the time, which my roommate Matt pointed out every time Danielle was not in the room during Tequila Night. "Becca's a sweet girl," Matt said, "don't do anything to screw that up!" That along with comments from everybody whose paths we crossed during our drunken meanderings between shots made for a jest-full night.

I was pretty drunk after that bottle was finished and with cheers and celebration of a job well done, I went to go check to make sure my original drinking partner was doing alright. She was all cozy and tucked into bed which was good but for me the night was not over. I decided to go pay a visit to my girlfriend, she wanted to see for herself just how drunk I was and upon getting to her room, her and her roommate Megan were very impressed and teased me about it obviously. They then decided that I should probably drink some water and gave me a bottle. I think there was something wrong with that water because as soon as I took one sip and it hit my stomach there was some sort of bad reaction and I hustled to the bathroom and unloaded the contents of my stomach.

A little bit later somehow the idea of The Lion King got brought up or popped into my head, I honestly cannot remember how it got there, but I started demanding to watch it. My demands ended up being met by my two lovely hosts and we started watching it, where I immediately started to fall asleep. I can only remember seeing the first few minutes of the movie before waking up to them telling me I should just crawl into bed. I crawled into my girlfriend's bed and was out like a light, I also happened to take up the entire bed and my girlfriend ended up sleeping on a couch. I am a gentlemen like that.

Sunday was not good at all. I woke up realizing that I could not move even the tiniest little bit without feeling the urge of being dizzy and wanting to throw up. So for the entire day I just stayed as perfectly still as I could until finally at about six to six thirty in the evening I just had to get up and go pee. I was confident that I was ok to return to my own building and decided along the way that I was good to even go play in my volleyball game that I had in about an hour. Yeah I was that stupid. It was just brutal, I was sweating like crazy, I was completely dehydrated, my reflexes were about as fast as a sloth, and I felt like I was going to die. On the bright side, I did not die. It was awful though, completely and thoroughly awful.

Great night, worst hangover I have ever had in my life.